I don't know how to make sense of this, a year plus & I'm still missing you, I still love, I love you so much as I've said it many times before, I don't care who you're with now, dear come back to me please, please
how do I make sense of this....
am I just stupid
The Cat Who Loved The Bird
Once, there was a cat who loved a bird; and the bird, she loved him too.
Every day they would find each other at the point where the earth meets the sky, and there their attachment grew.
Their love was made of soft down and amber, and it glowed in the moonlight like a candle in a desolate world.
The cat trimmed his claws and filed his teeth to protect his love, and he taught her to move like liquid fire between the tall stalks of grass—silent, sinewy, sonorous. And the bird stilled the beating of her wings, and she taught him to dance like air to the music of the clouds.
And so they lived, and so they loved, and so they played, and so they fit together the ragged edges of their differences like an infinite jigsaw puzzle, there where the earth met the sky.
And they were happy. Yes, they were happy.
The bird forgot the sky in the wide spaciousness of her love’s soul; she delighted in seeing the spray of sunlight on her feathers reflected in his eyes. And the cat—the cat found a richer depth than night within his love. He never tired to hear the echo of his voice in her feather-light bones.
Yes, they were happy, but a love such as theirs could never be easy. The night’s song drew the cat out of sleep; the wind beckoned the bird to follow, follow, follow it.
The cynics insisted the cat would devour the bird before a year had passed; the romantics argued breathlessly for love everlasting.
The reality was neither so pure, nor so tragic.
They lived and they loved where the earth met the sky, but the settlement weighed heavily on both of their sides…
“A bird may love a fish, but where would they [live]?” ~ Joseph Stein
A bird may love a cat, but could such a love survive?
Yes, vowed the cat; yes, vowed the bird. But neither could deny the truth beating in their chest. The cat craved the darkness; the bird craved the sky—no matter the heat of their passion; no matter how hard they tried.
It was a cosmic joke of the greatest proportions, to give two creatures such as they a love to challenge the laws of the universe—but no safe abode to contain it. The gods laughed at their predicament, only too well acquainted with the world where sky and earth connect.
Yet, the cat loved the bird, and the bird loved the cat, and while such a love could never be easy, it was as simple as that.
The bird needed the sky, while the cat sought the night, but still their hearts met between the hunt and the flight.
There is a place beyond the point where the earth meets the sky—where birds can flow like honeyed dark, and cats can also fly; where the wise ones call growth what we call compromise—a place of in-betweens, where metamorphosis resides.
It is there that the cat and the bird made their home, and the flame of their love continued to glow.
Sometimes, a cat is a cat and a bird is a bird—a cosmic joke is a joke, and the end is the end—but sometimes, just sometimes, beyond the horizon exists another world. When things are simple, but not easy, we can go there—perhaps.
The bird who loved the cat and the cat who loved the bird did just that.
And so they lived, and so they loved, and so the earth turned—like this story—without beginning, without end.
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it doesn't hurt to be alone again
I'm used to that...
it hurt you don't want me as much as i do
it hurt that you don't want to work things out
it hurt I'm not your sayang anymore
it hurt that you didn't give me the chance to hug you goodbye
it hurt just by thinking other girl will have a place in your heart
it hurt you can't accept me as I am
it hurt when you don't care
it hurt when i dont hear from you
it hurt to love you so much, to want you as my life partner
it hurt to cry over and over again
how is your decision is the right one when it hurt so much?
i failed miserably... what a girl to do when he's sick, my heart sunk... start the clock again, starting now..NO CONTACT RULE & i know I'm going to break it somehow haha
The truth is, everybody hurt. A simple careless act or action that doesn't justify your words may cause misunderstood, confusion and hurts. So here is a reminder for you, you are not the only one who get to feel the ache, pain and misery. What she did to you, hurt you and now you hurting me the same way.
I thought to open my heart to you once again, may bring happiness to me. I wish, hope and pray for everything to be different. It felt different this time, it really do. That's why i fight for you and tried so hard not to give up. Now, I almost give up...I'm standing on the line. It feels like you were putting one foot out the door and seems ready to leave anytime there's someone new or when she's ready to come back to you. Can't you see what a fool you been, just as fool as I am.
Do you remember what you said, that cheating is not in your dictionary of life...that's what I told you, because it is true for me. I'm still holding strong to my words but for you apparently it's just a word with no action.
Maybe I'm being paranoid, maybe....judging from your actions I should be. All I get now is good night and good morning wish. I guess that's all I deserve. I'm sorry I didn't answer your call, I'm sorry for me actually...that may have been your one last call and I'm too sick and tired to answer.
~a coward man is the one who awaken a woman's love with no intention of loving her~ Bob Marley...
P.s marley remind me of your puppy :'(
Sometimes i wonder,
I wonder if you ever think of me,
Or am I just here to fill your free time,
To take you out of boredom,
Do you want me only when you need me...
I know i can never be your first,
I cant compete with your memories,
And i cant make you forget them,
I'm nobody, I'm not perfect,
But i'll try to be the best for you,
If only i can be your last,
I wonder if there's a place for me in your heart?
If you care for me like i do for you?
In the end all that doesn't matter,
Because I know i'll still care for you..
It is raining outside just as much as my heart do. I don't know if there's something wrong that I don't know of but, i know my gut feeling is always right. For once, I do not want for it to be right. Let it just be I'm paranoid, that's better. I won't give up but I just need the strength or a steel heart. I pray that everything is alright and I can find peace in my heart. Deep inside my heart I know that I'm falling for you and willingly will hold your hand. My brain says please don't, if I'm not sure if you are going to let go.
